In recent posts we’ve shared about multi-generational relationships. While these relationships are important to reaching people of different generations, relationship building should never be viewed as a means to coerce others into our ways of thinking or adopt our practices. People of all generations are in need of relationships. God created us this way.

As discussed in another post building relationships requires us first to understand their particular cultural orientation. This does not mean we must like and adapt to their generational practice – i.e. music, dress style, their lingo or other habits. Yet, fostering a new relationship includes understanding where the other person is coming from. Example: Generation Z (Gen Zers), those teens and just now entering their adult years, research shows 75% do not want to let others down. The same number, 75%, want to make a difference in the lives of other people. Get to know and understand those God places in your path.

To be heard, we must first listen to understand regardless of the generation. To enter into a relationship each person must believe of the other person, “You matter to me. I care about who you are and your goals in life. I am willing to invest in you to allow you to become all God created you to be.” Fostering relationships with others begins with us. It is a common practice to wait for others of another generation to come to us. Yet, this is not a God-honoring, well-meaning practice. We, you and I, must be willing to reach out with a listening ear to show we care.

1. Perhaps the greatest teaching technique used by Jesus was stories. Stories paint a mental picture that creates a learning experience. Do not be afraid to use stories – yours and stories of others to foster new relationships with other generations (and listen to their stories). Expose your vulnerability through some stories.
2. Demonstrate Empathy. Empathy is the willingness to get into the mental and emotional feelings of another person. To earn the trust and respect required in fostering a new relationship empathy gives the other person permission to share his/her vulnerabilities with a sense of security. Romans 12:15 says, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.” This is demonstrating empathy.
3. Be an effective listener. Do not only listen to respond. Listen to understand. It is in our nature to key in on the first couple sentences and form a response. That is not effective listening and will destroy chances of fostering a healthy relationship.
4. Prayer is always a major source of fostering relationships. Not only praying for the other person but asking how you can pray for them. Include them in your prayer time, pray with him/her.

Certainly, these are not the only concepts for developing relationships. Pray and use your experience of what made other relationships work in your life. What are you looking for in genuine relationships? This is what others want too. Begin today praying for your role in fostering new intergenerational relationships.

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.