In reading Oswald Sanders book Spiritual Leadership, I came across the following statement. “Eyes that look are common, eyes that see are rare.”[i] The reality of truth in this statement is critical in great leadership. Yet, we are so busy looking that we rarely see. Sanders goes on to explain his statement with an illustration I have used many times as well. The religious leaders of Jesus’ day saw in the disciples only a band of fishermen, tax collectors, and other common, uneducated people. However, Jesus saw in Peter and the others men of integrity, prophets, preachers, workers with capacity, willing to go the extra mile.

The Pharisees and other religious leaders were looking on the outward appearance, knowing these men had a lack of education. Eyes that look are common: they did not try to see beyond the outward appearance of these twelve men. Jesus on the other hand saw a group of men with the potential to turn the world upside down, eyes that see are rare.

When you look at someone for the first time, what do you see? Subconsciously, when you meet a person for the first time, you make a series of judgments about that person in the first twenty seconds. Within those first twenty seconds you have made judgments and suppositions that you will use in every future interaction with that person. (Unless they can over time convince your subconscious to change those suppositions) Using these suppositions can cause you to miss the reality and potential of this person.

In coach training one area I try to work with participants on is using what I refer to as deeper listening skills. Deeper listening skills requires much more than using our normal mode of listening. In fact it requires more than using our ears. Developing your deeper listening skills perhaps requires more use of the eyes than the ears. Your spoken words make up only seven percent of your communication. Therefore, using only our ears and our normal listening means we could be missing out on ninety-three percent of what is being communicated to us.

As we first meet someone, in most cases, we are using our eyes even before our ears hear them speak. This is why the first twenty seconds plays such a critical role in “sizing up” other people. It is our eyes sending signals to our brain cataloging information about what we are seeing with what is already stored in our brain that causes us to form opinions and suppositions so quickly.  Example: You see a young man approaching you with earrings in both ears and one through his left eyebrow you automatically make assumptions based on your beliefs and the information stored in your brain. It does not take twenty seconds to make those assumptions. In fact you had particular thoughts about that person simply reading the statement above, though this person is fictional.

Learning to use your eyes and ears, listening and observing not only the spoken word, but the voice tone and inflection, body language, eye contact, and one of the most important, the emotion in voice and action, will guide you to being a greater leader, parent, and friend to those in your circle of influence. You will also see more effective and efficient production out of those same people.

Leaders need to understand the difference between looking and seeing as in Sanders’ quote. Study and develop skills to assist you in seeing beyond the surface. Look for the potential in people who report to you and work with you. Many a good talent has been overlooked because leaders were looking instead of seeing. “Eyes that look are common, eyes that see are rare.”

For more on this topic or learning to use Deeper listening skills contact George Yates or visit soncare.net.