Speak into Others by Listening

Throughout your lifetime, who has spoken into it? Likely, the older you are the more people you could name who have spoken into your life, made an indelible impact. Yet, no matter your age, someone stands out in your mind from your formative years, as an older child or teenager. During those formative years we are being shaped by our relationships. When an older person takes an interest in us during those years, it can be a life-changing, rewarding relationship experience.

Have you ever considered what about that person allowed you to trust and to listen to him/her? One of the main reasons people are able to speak into our lives is that he/she began by wanting to listen to us. He/she wanted to understand who we were and what we wanted or needed from life.

Think on this, every true, lasting relationship is enabled because we have taken time to understand each other, to get to know the heart of the other person. The challenge in every relationship is to take the time necessary to move through this understanding, not attempting to bypass it.

Scripture in Proverbs 24:3 says, “By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established.” God’s wisdom is certainly a plus in building any relationship. In addition, a common and reciprocal understanding of one another is required. Without this understanding the relationship is doomed to be short-lived.

Every person old enough to read and understand this is old enough to be an influence in another person’s life. I am so grateful for those God has placed in my path to impact me in a positive, God-centered way. Without them I would not have been able to be used by God over the years. I thank God upon every remembrance of each one who took time to understand me in my adolescent years, prior to those years and since.

The men and women (boys and girls) of our younger generations need those type relationships today. The world is filling young minds with all sorts of destructive behaviors and practices. The church must be the church and give time to listen to understand those of younger generations in our church, so that God can impact their lives as He has mine and perhaps yours.

Before you speak to be understood, it is vitally important to listen to understand. If you are not willing to lend an ear and listen, you cannot expect to be heard. Those who made an impact on you, whether you realize it or not, first listened to understand you, what you wanted or needed from life.

God has placed people around you, in your church and other life settings so that you can be His influencer to the next generations. What will you do today to be one who is given permission by those of younger generations to speak into their lives? It begins by being willing to listen for understanding.

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

One Priority in Your Church that May be Missing

Every Bible study small group should have one. Yet, many people in churches have no clue what a Ministry List is, nor have they heard of one. It is not a list of ministries. As I travel working with churches I seek to find out if the Bible study classes (Sunday School or other) take attendance, make a head count, or do nothing at all. Some people believe that taking attendance is a relic from the past and not necessary today. Others believe it may be okay for children’s classes but not for adults. Rarely is it ever considered that not taking attendance could be part of the cause of the decline in many of our churches today.

A ministry list should be present in every Bible study class. A ministry list is not only for taking attendance, it has many discipleship benefits for the class and each individual.

Minister To & With When your name appears on the Ministry List of a small group Bible study, you are agreeing to Minister To and With every person on that list. A ministry list is not only for one person to place a check mark in front of the names of all present. It is a list of everyone we agree to minister To in our group and that we also agree to carry out active ministry endeavors with, to others inside the church, community and around worldwide.

A second benefit is that disciple maturity comes through ministering & fellowshipping together. With a ministry list you can ensure that everyone is at least invited to serve together in ministry projects. We grow together in relationships and in spirituality when we serve together putting into practice what we study in our Bible study group.

Lessens the chance of Someone Falling through the Cracks A third benefit of a ministry list is it lessens the chance of someone falling through the cracks. With a ministry list in place and maintained properly, you can eliminate speculative conversations concerning absentees.

Not only for keeping up with and caring for absentees, a ministry list can assist the class in making sure no one is left out of planning or participating in class activities, caring for others, or class get-togethers. Too often those quiet or fringe people never get asked or included in participation in things he/she might enjoy and may have a special giftedness.

Gives Everyone Opportunity to Serve Tied in with the other benefits is the fact that a Ministry List gives everyone a place to serve and grow. If your name is on that list, you have agreed to minister To and With every other person on that list. Each person has gifts, talents, and treasures to offer. Not any one person has been called or gifted to meet every need or to respond in every situation. Yet, in your small group, there is someone gifted with meeting individual needs as they arise.

What will it take to activate a true Ministry list for your group(s)?

This post is excerpted from an upcoming book on 7 Essentials for every Bible study small group.

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

“My Very Dear Wife” – Sarah’s Letter

On this Memorial Day I came across this well-known letter from Major Sullivan Ballou to his beloved wife just days before his death. Ballou’s letter captures not only the passion for life and love of family, but also respect for the divine, and spirit of patriotic righteousness that led many men to enlist in times of war in generations past. This is only part of the letter. Please look it up and read its entirety.

Headquarters, Camp Clark
Washington, D.C., July 14, 1861

My Very Dear Wife:

Indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days, perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write you again, I feel impelled to write a few lines, that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more.

Our movement may be one of a few days duration…and it may be one of severe conflict and death to me. Not my will, but thine, O God be done. If it is necessary that I should fall on the battlefield…, I am ready. I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in, the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American civilization now leans upon the triumph of government, and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and suffering of the Revolution, and I am willing, perfectly willing to lay down all my joys in this life to help maintain this government, and to pay that debt.

But, my dear wife, when I know, that with my own joys, I lay down nearly all of yours, and replace them in this life with care and sorrows, when, after having eaten for long years the bitter fruit of orphanage myself, I must offer it, as their only sustenance, to my dear little children, is it weak or dishonorable, while the banner of my purpose floats calmly and proudly in the breeze, that my unbounded love for you, my darling wife and children, should struggle in fierce, though useless, contest with my love of country.

I cannot describe to you my feelings on this calm summer night,… I, suspicious that Death is creeping behind me with his fatal dart, am communing with God, my country and thee.

Sarah, my love for you is deathless. It seems to bind me with mighty cables, that nothing but Omnipotence can break; and yet, my love of country comes over me like a strong wind, and bears me irresistibly on with all those chains, to the battlefield. The memories of all the blissful moments I have spent with you come crowding over me…I feel most deeply grateful to God and you, that I have enjoyed them so long…how hard it is for me to give them up, and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together, and seen our boys grow up to honorable manhood around us.

I know I have but few claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me, perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my little Edgar, that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed. If I do not, my dear Sarah, never forget how much I love you, nor that, when my last breath escapes me on the battlefield, it will whisper your name…

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

Ridding the Small-minded Jealousies of Leadership

Movies have been made, stories have been written, and each one of us could share of personal experiences of poor leadership. Even Jesus’ own Disciples debated of who would come out top of the list of leading for Jesus.

At one point, James and John, brothers, the sons of Zebedee, petitioned Jesus for seats of highest position. Some have said these two even recruited their mother to petition Jesus on their behalf, referring to Matthew 20:20-28. If they did indeed put her up to it, that is pretty low. Either way it shows our desire to be above the rest. The other disciples were caught up in the desire to be “leader of the pack” as well.

One author commented on the exchange this way, “Everybody was caught off guard. Stunned. The commanding General of heaven’s armies looked them in the eyes and made Himself so perfectly clear that not even a child in their midst could have missed the point.”

  “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles dominate them, and the men of high position exercise power over them. 26 It must not be like that among you. On the contrary, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, 27 and whoever wants to be first among you must be your slave; 28 just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life—a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:25-28

Jesus made it clear, Leadership is not about being “the boss”. It is about serving. Leadership is not about lording over someone, it is not about strutting, but about stooping to supply. Leadership is not about demanding from, but caring for.

In this short passage Jesus clarified for us the reality of leadership. He demonstrated this type of leadership for three and a half years.

Leadership is conducted in one of two ways. The first is by fear of punishment. The other is through the art of loving care. One is productive, the other might appear productive, yet not with desired results. Leadership based on love and care will always prove more fruitful and effective.

Too often in the world and in church we miss this tremendous principle of production. We may not realize it but too often we are perceived as strutting around demanding submission rather than stooping into the trenches to show that we care enough to share the workload.

Jesus said of that mindset of control by position, demanding submission, “It shall not be so among you!” Cry out to God asking for the mind of Christ in all your roles of leading and pray for the leaders of your church to be Christ-minded leaders.

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

 

It’s About Trusting, Not Trying

As a child, I heard many sermons, in church three times a week, plus revivals and special meetings. I do not remember most of those, but one that has always stuck with me, though I do not remember who delivered it, Stop Trying, Start Trusting.

Our tendency is to try in our own power what God desires us to trust Him to provide or accomplish. Even in church we see something that we believe God desires and we attempt to do it “our way”.  We don’t wait for God’s direction. “I love God, I know what pleases God, therefore if I go ahead and move forward with the way I think it could be accomplished, then I will please God.”

There is an awful lot of “I’s” in that statement. That is not trusting or waiting on God. God wants and deserves our trust. Yes, it is easier to do what we think would please God, but that is trying in our own power, not allowing God to provide a great learning experience and spiritual growth as He desires.

After forty days in the wilderness, Jesus was tempted by Satan three times. Each temptation was an attempt to get Jesus to do something without trusting God the Father for it.

Jesus had been fasting for forty days – without food. No doubt, He was hungry. Satan’s temptation; “Command these stones to become bread.” This is Jesus, God’s Son. He spoke the world into being, certainly He could have turned a few rocks into bread.

Satan’s second temptation for Jesus was, to show Him all the kingdoms of the world and promise to give them to Him. This one to me has always seemed foolish on Satan’s part. Jesus is God, all the kingdoms of earth belong to Him already, though Satan is ruling in this present age.

The third temptation, Satan takes Jesus to the top of the temple and tempts Him to jump off stating God’s angels would not let any harm come to Jesus.

Each one of these temptations was daring Jesus to act in His own power, to turn His back on trusting God. Jesus answered each one with scripture. Each time Jesus was demonstrating for us, teaching us to stop trying on our own to accomplish the things which God desires our trust for His blessing.

Each time you and I act in our own will, trying to do things our way – even good Godly things – we are trying, not trusting God for what He desires for us. How many blessings do you and I miss out on trying instead of trusting?

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

Biblical Community, Are You Called to it?

Biblical Community, Are You Called to it? Where do you find it? If you consider yourself a Bible believing, Gospel trusting, follower of Jesus Christ, then you must consider yourself a Christian, right? If these things are true of you and you are a Genuine Christian, then you are called to Biblical Community. But what is Biblical Community?

The concept of Biblical Community is predominant to the Christian life. Biblical Community is foundational in the teachings of Jesus Christ and all the writers of the New Testament. In the book of Acts we see the early church – the first Christian believers – in Biblical Community.

Acts chapter one they are in the upper room together for days, praying, living in Biblical Community. In chapter two we read in verses 42-47 of Biblical Community. We see it in Acts chapter 3 & 4 and again in chapter 6, a need is met while living in Biblical Community.

But what is the reality of necessity of Biblical Community today? Biblical community provides a nurturing environment for spiritual growth – discipleship. It is through shared worship, Bible study, and fellowship, believers are encouraged in their own and edifying others in our faith journey.

Not only encouragement, through Biblical Community we find strength and support for living out our God-given purpose daily. God has built within us a desire for relationships. This is where we obtain support, through our relationships. For the believer, Biblical Community is the only place you will ever, in this life, find that needed support.

So, where do you find Biblical Community? In the church? Yes, in a sense, but no matter the size of a worship service, none can fill the innate desire God has placed in your heart. True fulfillment of Biblical Community is only found in relationship fostering in small groups. This is why small group Bible study classes are so imperative to Biblical Community.

Yet, many churches, many Bible study classes, many Sunday Schools, have forgotten or strayed away from Biblical Community. We settle for an hour together, once a week, for Bible study. While Bible study is a huge, intricate part of growing as a Disciple, it is not Biblical Community.

In Acts 2:42-47 we find that Biblical Community extended beyond Bible teaching. They encouraged, supported and cared for one another’s needs. They were ministering to one another. Also, they were sharing with others, outsiders, therefore their numbers were growing – daily, which encouraged every believer even more. They were also praising God, worshipping together. Biblical Community is a complete 7 day a week lifestyle.

How is your Biblical Community? Are you too busy? You need Biblical Community. As a believer, God has called you to Biblical Community. Biblical Community is still as critical today as was the early church. What will you do today to begin praying and studying  about Biblical Community, and engaging in a small Group that truly promotes and lives in Biblical Community?

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

Three Trapdoors of Leadership

You have seen them on theatrical stages and in cartoons. A person standing on a stage in performance, when suddenly they appear to fall through the stage. Reality is a trap door has been triggered to drop the person (character) through the stage floor, disappearing from sight.

There are trap doors in leadership as well. These have engulfed many ministers as well as other leaders. In this article we will look at three.

1, The pursuit of success. We all want to do better, to be “successful” in our work for God. God has indeed planted in each person a desire to succeed. The real issue is not success, but what we do with prospering efforts and outcomes in our lives.

With every small sign of victory in serving God, we must battle the flesh to remain humble, realizing the success is not ours but of God working through us. With each level of fruitful service we are blessed to encounter in life, the more the flesh wants to take credit. “The flesh is never satisfied with our present state of success. We want more. It is easy to become a slave to the pursuit of success – even to the point of stating “we’re doing it for God.”

2, The pursuit of possessions. Growing up I often heard the term, “Keeping up with the Jones’. This was usually spoken of someone trying to outdo their neighbors, attempting to have the newest, biggest of everything, to be the envy of the neighborhood or of the family.

In business and ministry we have a tendency to do the same. Not only ministers, but every believer. We chase after possessions sometimes to the detriment of our witness – and our bank account.

It seems to be a tendency in our society, to chase after more, wanting bigger, better, more. Just a few years ago a 25 inch screen was the norm of all TVs. You had a 19 or 25” screen. Today, it is hard to imagine how one could watch a sporting event on such a small screen. Unless of course you turn the 7” screen on your $1200 phone sideways to watch. We want more, the newest, most advanced of everything.

Unfortunately, this drive has more people living as slaves in a never-ending cycle of debt with no plan of recovery.

3, The pursuit of pleasure. We all desire the good things of life. We desire the opportunities and possessions that bring us pleasure. And like a good dessert, we have a little and we want more and more. We want differing types of this pleasure. The inner self is never satisfied with what we have. What we have leaves us with a longing for more. Pretty soon we are seeking the pleasure, not the will of God.

The first two trapdoors are both tied to this third one. It is a pursuit for happiness and pleasure that lures us from God’s directive and true joy in our lives. God has blessed us with a world of good things that can bring pleasure. Yet, it is our greed that drives us into these never-ending quests for more. More power, more “things”, more pleasure.

What trap doors in your life will you confess to God today to begin your turn around journey to seek the pleasure of His will in your life?

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

Five Phases of Decline

People ask, How do we know if our church is in decline? My answer is, “At first, decline is so subtle that most people, including pastors, do not recognize the decline.” As Interim Pastor at my home church, I advised the church we were in decline, to which I received stares as if I was weird. To which I replied, our pastor has left along with his wife and four daughters. That is six people we lost with one family leaving this church. Until we replace seven, we are in decline.

The early stages of decline are subtle and often unnoticed. In Reaching the Summit, here are five stages of Decline identified that every church will go through if they do not take action to reverse the declining trends.

Phase one – Loss of Vision – This is the most subtle phase of all. It goes unnoticed because it is one member or one family at a time. In this phase there is often a lack of expectations on members.

Phase Two – Lack of Purpose – As the losses mount decline begins to affect the ministry of the church. Attendance and membership start declining at a higher rate, which also brings lessening financial support. This may bring attention to leaders, but little is done to stop the bleeding.

In phase two we settle for good, ministries suffer, and we see unchecked control in some churches.

Phase Three – Denial of Reality – Evidence of decline becomes obvious. However, the tendency is to discount or explain away negative data. Leaders tend to explain away by passing the blame instead of shouldering responsibility to reverse the declining trends. Churches tend to change or drop their counting practices as if to hide the decline. In some the attitude becomes, we just need “our people” to work harder, do more.

Phase Four – Grasping for Survival – In phase four, the realization that a staggering change is necessary become apparent. There is often a sudden switch to survival mode. Churches begin grasping for anything they have seen or heard from other churches. Grasping for survival.

Phase four churches often enhance the treatment of symptoms, not causes. Treating symptoms will never heal. It is only when you begin treating the causes of decline that you see an effective reversing of decline. Treating symptoms is only hiding the pain, not eradicating it, often bringing a series of injurious decisions.

Unfortunately, most churches will not reach out for help until they are in deep phase four of decline.

Phase Five – Relinquishment of Ministry – Most churches in the first four phases can reverse decline with assistance from a proven and qualified coach or coaching team. However, there are some churches who will reach phase five. These churches no longer have people or financial resources to maintain the facilities much less carry out ministry. The best we can pray for is that the property and assets be used to glorify God. This can come in several forms, each continuing the work of God in the community.

Every church and every leader should always be on the watch, reviewing these phases to ensure the church is not falling into or through these phases. Reviewing these today, where do you identify your church? If you say, “Not on this list” are you certain, or are you in phase three? How will you begin today praying about the spiritual health of your church?

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

 

An Objective Evaluation of Your Ministry

In making an objective evaluation of your ministry setting, begin with these two questions: 1) What happened leading up to the point at which decline became visible?

2) What did the organization do in the wake of this visible evidence?

The answer to the first question most often has to do with a financial shortage or a loss of key lay leaders in the church. Until there is a shortage of financial resources or manpower to carry out ministry, many church leaders ignore the signs of decline.

The second question is designed to allow church leaders to review actions taken or the lack of action. Many leaders will instinctively react with a defensive reply.

A trained quality coach is crucial here to ask additional questions, enabling him to assist church leaders in recognizing misguided actions as well as good achievements.

Churches that have been in decline for several years tend to gradually move to a turned-in mentality (not reaching or benefiting the community). One line of questioning to use is to ask for the thoughts of church members and leaders on the strengths of the church. (What is the church good at doing?)  Have a scribe write on a board or large sheet of paper all of the responses.

After everyone has had a chance to list their ideas of the perceived church strengths, take each response one by one and ask the question, “Who is this for?” When someone responds, I ask, “Is that someone in the community or church members?” Normally the trend is that most, if not all, of the perceived strengths in a declining church are for the church members, not the unsaved community.

Sometimes it takes two or three questions to bring the realization to the table. For example, one response at a particular church was “We prepare and carry meals to senior shut-ins.” “Who are these shut-ins?”

“People who can’t get out.” (As if I didn’t know this already.)

“How do you get the names of these shut-ins?”

“We know them.”

“How do you know them?”

“They are members of our church, or their family comes here.”

The realization was that this might have been a strength of the church, but it was not being used as an outreach strength to grow the church. It was “for members only.” I then led these church members in discussion using a series of questions to help them see how, if this was a strength of the church, it could be used to carry the love of God to others outside the church.

Every church in decline has strengths that could be used in reaching the lost, but they have forgotten and drifted toward a turned-in ministry—turned in to only the members of the church.

Leaders of a declining organization must come to the realization that the organization is in decline and that their actions (or inactions) may have contributed to the cause of the decline. However, it is not time to throw in the towel. There are principles and steps to reverse the declining trends. There must be a “want to” attitude among the leaders first and also among the members of the organization. How’s your want to?

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.

How’s Your “Being” and “Doing”?

Churches do not intentionally walk away from their purpose (first love). Decline is certainly not in the motives or objectives of any church. Oftentimes we get caught up in the busyness of church life to the detriment of “being” the Church. Other times it is being the Church that begins the slide. Let’s look at the two sides of this coin.

Churches often fall into decline due to the busyness of “doing,” instead of “being,” the Church. This happens when programs, events, and bureaucracy (administration) overtake spiritual preparation and ministry to the community. While the Church was theoretically designed to be self-feeding for spiritual growth, it was also instituted by God to feed the spiritual needs of the community.

Therefore, we could say the Church is a twofold feeding station. 1) to feed spiritually and grow the members and regular attendees, 2) to reach out to meet the needs of the community, guiding them in spiritual matters and decisions as well. The presumed need to keep programs and events going can overtake our passion and desire to serve God in reaching the lost communities around us.

While never intentional, this is quite common in today’s Christian culture in North America, especially in established churches. Because certain programs and events started as good and viable, our tendency is to keep them going as in previous eras. However, times change, the culture changes, and people change. A ministry event that worked well five years ago is likely not going to bring the same results today, especially if the ministry has not been evaluated, revised, and updated annually. This is how churches fall into the tradition mode, and following tradition for the sake of tradition will lead us straight to decline and extinction.

The second side of our coin is that sometimes “being the Church” causes the slide into decline. By the term being the Church I am referring to actually doing ministry as Jesus has called us to do. How can doing the “right stuff” lead to decline? Overreaching, taking on too much or too many ministry efforts, can plunge a church or other organization into decline.

Church leaders can find themselves in a good and growing position and unwisely leap into more and more growth strategies and ministries at the neglect of the passion that brought the initial achievement. This will often lead to decline by way of exhaustion, stretching resources and people too thin, and burnout.

It is imperative that church and ministry leaders make an objective evaluation of the reality of all aspects and facts of their ministry setting. I suggest that the best way to conduct a truly objective evaluation of all the facts is to bring in a neutral observer from outside the ministry or church to work with a team from within the church.

This should be someone such as a seasoned consultant, coach, or strategist, trained and experienced in asking probing questions that the church leaders and members might not think of or want to bring to the table on their own. An unbiased, qualified outsider is your absolute best effort in avoiding or reversing decline in the church.

Have you open and honestly evaluated your “being” and “doing” lately?

George Yates is an Organizational Health Strategist and coach, assisting churches, organizations, and individuals in pursuing God’s purpose for life. Click here to receive this blog in your email inbox each Tuesday.